Same Old Stuff: Ficlets and Oneshots
by Anesther
Summary: There are a lot of these out there...hence the title. New chapters: Ch. 20-Not What It Seems
1. Kikyo and Sesshomaru with a Lemon

_**Random Shit **_

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Kikyo and Sesshomaru with a Lemon

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"Hey Sesshomaru, why is it that we're here in Kagome's room?" Kikyo asked as she followed the taiyoukai.

"Because we can and since she's an annoying bitch we have a reason for doing so," he replied stoically.

It's been a few months since the two realized that they had the ability to pass through the well and they took the liberty of exploring her world from a distance. Sesshomaru told Kikyo that if they wanted to be here they had to be discreet so no one would know about it.

"You know, I never really knew what this was." Sesshomaru said as he pointed to this peculiar object that was on a wooden dresser.

Kikyo eyed it for a moment and remembered a conversation that her reincarnation and former love had a month ago.

"Oh this is a computer," she informed him. "I heard Inuyasha and the girl talking about it while she bragged about how great it was. I think this is how you turn it on,"

Kikyo pushed a button and the screen turned on. On the screen was a story of some sort that popped on.

"Strange device," Kikyo said while Sesshomaru nodded in agreement.

"Do you think this is a story?" Sesshomaru questioned as he examined it curiously.

"It seems so. Maybe we should read it,"

The two read the top lines:

This is a story that popped into my head while traveling with my friends.

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha (but I could if I wanted to)

**Caution: Lemon**

_Impudent woman, _the two thought. _What's a lemon? _

The two picture a yellow lemon.

They read:

Kikyo was bathing in a hot spring and hearing a sound turned around to see Sesshomaru standing tall above her and he slowly undresses and enters the hot spring.

Sesshomaru slowly pulls Kikyo into his embrace and begins to kiss her neck, slowly coming upwards to her mouth and pleas for access with his tongue. He lets his claws travel slowly down the small of her back and Kikyo responds eagerly by tracing her fingers down his chest to his manhood.

Kikyo and Sesshomaru jump from the computer and with heated faces glance at each other for a brief moment before averting each other's gaze. The two glanced back at the computer and with strong determination went back to the computer and continued reading the story that no matter how much they wanted to get away from it, they were drawn to it.

After they finished reading, the two were such a dark shade of red that it looked like all the blood in their systems rushed to their faces.

"Descriptive…" Kikyo said after a long moment of silence that seemed to stretch an eternity.

"Mm…" Sesshomaru responded as he peered out the window.

Kikyo stood from the chair and began to walk away when she heard a dissolving noise from behind.

"Sesshomaru what are you doing?!" she shrieked in alarm as she watched the computer disintegrate.

"We had to get rid of it." Sesshomaru told her.

"Why though?"

Sesshomaru whirled to face her with slightly wide eyes. "Don't tell me you enjoyed that thing that said we got intimate!"

Kikyo blushed furiously from embarrassment and anger. "You know that's not what I meant! What if she comes back and sees that her computer is nothing but a melted pile of sticky liquid?!"

Sesshomaru was about to respond when he heard a noise from below and recognized the voices. "Aw shit! They're here!"

Kikyo gasped and opened the window while dragging Sesshomaru. "We have to get out of here," she whispered hurriedly and wasting no time, Sesshomaru picked her up and with ease landed on the other side of the house where the well was. Immediately jumping into it, the two arrived on the other side and Sesshomaru leapt out from it.

Kikyo sighed in relief, suddenly being struck with reality that Sesshomaru was holding her, a sudden blush touching her cheeks and he must've realized it too since he turned a bright shade of red and quickly set her down.

"I swear though," Kikyo said after a moment. "I'll never look at lemons the same way again,"

Sesshomaru only nodded and sat down beside her. "Uh, so…"

Kikyo glanced at him. "What?"

"Can we try that?"

Kikyo sweat dropped.

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A/N: Thought they were going to do it eh? No, but they will. Maybe... Tell me if it sucks 'kay? 


	2. Things the Characters Wouldn't Say

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Inuyasha:

10. Will ANYONE please give my ears a tweak?

9. Ramen? I don't want to eat your nasty ramen Kagome!

8. Myoga- jiji, I understand you. You weren't running away but thinking about what was best for us all. Here, have a little sip of my blood.

7. Why don't we invite Naraku, Kagura and Kanna to our little get together? I need to thank Naraku for what he did for me by getting rid of Kikyo…

6. Koga, let's stop this name calling and become best buds.

5. I think we should donate the Shikon no Tama to the village. It's just too pretty for to have.

4. Let's forget our differences. Here, you can have the Tetsusaiga Sesshomaru-nii-chan.

3. Can't we just talk about this? If we can avoid violence…

2. (After her resurrection) Kikyo, you're the nicest girl I know. Try to be a little evil sometimes okay?

1. (In front of his entire party in a loud voice without blushing) Kagome, I love you! Let's get married right now! Screw Kikyo and any thoughts about having been responsible for her death!

Sango:

1. Houshi-sama? Can I bear your children?

2. I'm going to forget Kohaku. He's dead and it's not really my fault.

3. Now that I get a good look, Inuyasha's really hot…

4. Naraku, if you release my brother, I'll become your sex slave!

5. Shut up Kagome! My problems are far worse than yours!

6. Miroku, why is it that you torment me? Isn't it enough that my brother is in the hands of my enemy, I have to deal with your lechery?

7. Hmm, Miroku seems to have fun flirting. I'll give that a try.

8. Kirara, please carry my stuff and everyone on your back.

9. Why does Kagome get all the hot and attractive guys, that aren't lecherous and perverted?

10. Poor monk, maybe I shouldn't have hit him so hard.

Kagome:

1. Forget school! Who needs to worry about tests?

2. I don't care about all your guys' problems, let's talk about me dammit!

3. Shippo quit being such a baby! And quit sitting on my lap, shoulders or anywhere else. Ever heard of personal space?

4. Myoga-ji-chan, I wanna run away too! Inuyasha can take care of himself right?

5. Hojo-kun, I love you!

6. Naraku, I know Kikyo turned you but can you accept her reincarnation instead?

7. Inuyasha, sorry but I'm running away with Koga… He makes me happy, and well, you don't.

8. Sesshomaru, I've come to elope with you. You are the much better looking, stronger, more gentle brother…

9. Step aside Inuyasha. Let me handle this one!

10. You want to kill me Kikyo? Go right ahead! I want **YOU** to be happy!

Kikyo:

1. Hello. My name is Kikyo and I have a serious problem with my sort of ex-boyfriend. I hope you can all support me as I try to get over him.

2. Kaede, why are you still the same height as when I died 50 years ago?

3. Damn I wish I would've gone for that Onigumo guy…

4. First I passed up Onigumo, and then I passed up Sesshomaru. Now **WHAT** was I thinking?

5. Forget taking you to hell, I've got tickets to the Bahamas Inuyasha!

6. Inuyasha, I wish you well with Kagome. I just love to see two people in love with each other. : giggles:

7. Kagome, let's put aside our differences. Inuyasha just isn't worth it!

8.Waving aside the Shinidamachuu: Ew! Go away! I hate snake-looking creatures!

9. Being a miko is depressing. I wanna become a full fledged demon!

10. All this time people thought I was going after Inuyasha. Boy were they wrong! I don't want anyone to have Kagome but ME! **GOT THAT?!**

Miroku:

1. I'm sorry Sango. I didn't mean to stroke your ass.

2. I wonder do I really hurt Sango.

3. Shippo, do you want to learn about girls at a young age?

4. Inuyasha, holding Kagome against your back when she rides you is it fun?

5. (In front of Inuyasha and Sango) Kagome marry me and bear my children.

6. Girls aren't very willing… Maybe guys would be a better choice…

7. Kirara, is it possible for you to know what Sango likes?

8. Inuyasha, go out with me. We both need physical attention, don't deny it.

9. I hope my Wind Tunnel does suck me up.

10. Kikyo and Kagura look more attractive each time I see them.

Sesshomaru:

1. Inuyasha you can keep the sword but I want the human women with you.

2. Die Rin…

3. I'm sorry Jaken.

4. Why does my brother get all the girls? It's not fair…

5. Naraku, I'll become your ally but I get to fuck you first.

6. Where the hell is that priestess? I wish I'd asked her to join my group.

7. God dammit Inuyasha! You think being a demon is all fun and games. It's not! You don't have all sorts of demons banging at your fucking door!

8. I wonder if that ramen stuff is good like Inuyasha says.

9. Why do I look like a girl?

10. I love humans.

Inuyasha pt2:

1. Actually Kagome, when we met, I really did mean 'get naked.'

2. I love it when you say 'sit'! Do it again!

3. Amen. :puts hands in prayer position:

4. Does Kagome where sports bras when she's with me?

5. Do I really make fun of Kagome?

6. :chanting: Burn the jewel! Burn the jewel!

7. Okay Kikyo. This hugging thing is not right.

8. Hey Miroku, how do you get close enough to grab their butts? I need pointers. :takes out paper and a pen:

9. Sorry Shippo.

10. You were just as good-looking as your sister Kaede.

11. Koga! What's up:high fives him:

12. Inuyasha's the name, two-timing two hot human girls is my game.

13. Hey Sango:whistles: Why don't you walk me, why baby:sends a kiss:

14. Yay! I'm turning human!

15. Soul Scattering Iron Claw! – Damn! I broke a nail!

16. Really? I love soap operas!

17. Kagome, are you attracted to my body?

18. :as a full demon:looks down: Whoa! My eyes, ears and hair aren't the only things that make me look like a full fledged demon!

19. Every time I catch Kagome, I miss her butt. :snaps finger:

20. Who's up for a game of 'brother please kick my ass?!'

21. Sota! I'll give you five bucks if you get your sister to like me.

22. Par-tay!

23. :in his sleep:snorts: But mommy, I wanna ride the pony.

24. Miroku we've known each other for a long time and I think it's time I fess up. :sighs: I liked since the day we met, and if you don't feel the same way, I understand.

25. Ya know I don't really hate my brother. :tears swell in his eyes: When I fight him, it's a way I show him how upset I am that we weren't able to have that special 'bond' that two brothers are supposed to have. :sobs:

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A/N: If you don't like it, feel free to say so. Since I'm a Kikyo fan there were some things in there I didn't like and did like. Guess...


	3. Sesshomaru has an Admirer

_**Sesshomaru has an Admirer**_

Kikyo kept her eyes fixed on the white clouds above, her eyes closed as she coveted her mind for answers to the impossible.

She no longer felt the sun's warm rays cast down on her and opened her mahogany orbs to see golden oculars gaze down at her.

"Sesshomaru?" she asked.

"Help me out,"

"What for?" she asked, now upright and staring at him with suspicious curiosity.

Looking over one shoulder than the next, he said, "I'm trying to hide from Jaken,"

"Jaken?" she questioned as she raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me that the great Lord Sesshomaru is scared of the little imp,"

He scowled at her. "No, I do not fear him out of all demons. Well, in a matter of power…"

This was bemusing her very much so she asked, "What's wrong? Has he gained some sort of strength?"

"Not exactly…" he told her, his eyes downwards.

Kikyo peered at him with growing curiosity, he now peeked her interest. "You have to inform me what's going on, Sesshomaru if you require my assistance."

He suddenly began to pout. "Alright fine. But, you have to promise me you won't breathe anything, to anybody, or laugh. Got it?"

"I promise," she told him.

Sesshomaru was now flushing with embarrassment and he gestured for Kikyo to come closer to whisper something in her ear.

Kikyo blinked at the new information and she was suddenly reeling on the ground in laughter.

"What?! Are you serious?!" she asked between fits of giggles and laughs.

The demon was now a bright red. "This is not funny Kikyo!"

This did nothing to calm her fits of laughter.

"Please, calm down. You promised me you wouldn't laugh!"

Kikyo suddenly regained her composure and gave him a serious look. "You're right. This is no laughing matter. Why don't you just tell him you don't feel the same?"

"But than he'll know that I know!"

"Mm," Kikyo said as she began to ponder about her friend's predicament. "Well, this shows that no matter how much you beat him to nothing but a pulp, he will always have a soft spot for you."

"But it's creepy. Have you heard him talk in his sleep?!"

Kikyo glanced at him. "In his sleep?"

Sesshomaru was now with his usual neutral stoic expression and let out a sigh. "Yes, he talks in his sleep."

The miko raised her head and asked, "Does he sleep or nap around this time?"

"Probably," he stated with casualty before he peered at her questioningly and asked, "What are you thinking priestess,"

She was suddenly up and she began to head into the woods Sesshomaru trailing after her.

"No! Kikyo don't! Come on! Be nice for once!"

Stopping by a small clearing, she scanned the small area and saw a small green imp asleep beneath a tree. _Now I get to hear for myself. Sesshomaru could be making this up. _

Sesshomaru was beside her and grabbed her by the shoulder. "You don't plan to ask him do you?"

"No. I'm just going to sneak up beside him and listen to him."

"No," he told her firmly.

She sighed. "Sometimes you don't lighten up."

"Because this problem involves me."

Crossing over to the imp, she kneeled down and strained her ears to catch the slightest bit of a whisper.

The toad demon began to mumble something and she asked Sesshomaru who came up beside her, "Does he respond to questions?"

Sesshomaru shrugged. "Don't know. Never wanted to ask."

"Well, get ready to listen." She shifted closer to him and whispered into his ear, "Jaken, what are you thinking about?"

The toad muttered something that couldn't be understood.

"Repeat that," she commanded him

"S-Sesshomaru… Sama…"

Smirking she asked, "Do you like him?"

"Uh-huh,"

Sesshomaru was silently hitting his head with a tree, his face red with embarrassment and began to curse like nothing else under his breath.

"What do you plan to do to him?"

"St… Stuff…"

"What kind of stuff?"

"Gonna… Tell him… To go faster…"

"Faster?"

Jaken nodded. "Yes… He's also not deep… Enough…"

Kikyo had to stifle a laugh that threatened to escape her lips. "He's not,"

"No…"

Sesshomaru was now scratching the bark off the tree, his claws penetrating the rough outer surface with ease as he was now becoming irritated. A vein throbbed endlessly on his head.

"Also…"

"Also what?" Kikyo questioned the slumbering toad.

"He… Needs… To be more… Gentle…"

Kikyo almost exploded at that little bit of information while Sesshomaru's eyes widened as he sweat dropped.

Kikyo was about to ask the demon another question, when the silver haired demon suddenly grabbed her and ran off in a random direction.

"There. You got your chance to know that he likes me. Rub it in, you die."

"Poor Sesshomaru," she said in a fake apologetic tone as she patted his shoulder in a consoling manner.

"Shut up. Well, I'm definitely going to keep my distance from him,"

"Well at least you have an admirer."

"Why do you say that?"

"I thought no one liked you,"

Sesshomaru sighed and hung his head. _I must be the unluckiest demon in this fucking messed up world…_


	4. Memories of Warm Ice

_**Memories of Warm Ice**_

Long black tresses framed a winsome face as soft gentle steps were made in the white blanket that covered the ground.

Glancing up, she watched gentle flakes fall about her as light as feathers.

Snow.

She had always admired the beauty that nature could provide. Yet, she could no longer experience much warmth now.

Stretching out a delicate hand, she watched as a few small pristine flakes landed on her hand, but, to her disappointment, they did not melt within her icy palm.

Her usual narrow gaze seemed to soften as sadness consumed her. She could no longer experience such warmth. The feel of another's warm skin against hers, to warm another's lips with her own. Those were now just memories. Memories that could only be thought of as another lifetime.

She knew that. She was no longer alive. These feelings were now memories.

What she was not sure of was if they were really her memories or that of the souls that whispered in her mind.

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A/N: Yes. Not everything will be funny. 


	5. Halfbreed

You're filthy.

That's what they spat at you. You've heard that since you were born.

An innocent child that bore no wrong upon his shoulders, still suffered the fate of having two different bloods running through your veins, the fate of a half breed, a pitiful hanyou.

As you grew under the comforting shield of your mother, you often wondered what happened to make them hate you so…

Innocent curiosity would spark up when you ventured forth outside. The different sights, the different smells were fascinating to you. You could hear the many different sounds and the ears atop your head of silver would flinch at every noise: from the sound of footsteps to the chirping of the gay birds that were perched on the tall branches.

Your eyes glimmered with wonder, a giggle spurting forth and wanting to break out from your lips as you romped around the courtyard and tossed around the ball into the air just to let it fall into your hands. You would enjoy this little exercise, jumping around like you had nothing to worry about, nothing to be sad about. You had your mother, who would watch from afar, her brown orbs sparkling with merriment and you would feel happy and light under her soft stare.

Small laughter reaches your ears and you turn towards the sound. Jogging over to the direction of the source, you'd peek from the side of a building and you'd meet the figure of a child around your age. You smile at the newcomer, your little fangs gleaming from the light, but the minute you do their face becomes one of fear. You do not know what has caused them to be like this and take a step forward only for them to take one back.

Raising an eyebrow, wondering what you have done makes you want to make up for it, and you outstretch your hands to hold out the ball, indicating that you apologize and want to play.

The child whimpers and hurriedly scampers back, their legs taking them far from you.

Blinking at their departure, you ask yourself: Why were they so scared of me?

You pout and a frown plasters itself on your face, but shrug off the matter.

As you walk over to a tree to rest beneath, you place your toy on the ground and sit down.

Why was that kid scared of me?

Though you kept telling yourself it was nothing, the thought would continue to come.

You twiddle your little fingers in your lap and purse your lips as the annoying question continues to swirl around in your head.

A woman's melodic voice breaks your musings, reaching your sensitive ears and you turn your head in the direction of your mother's call.

Standing up immediately, you run as fast as you can over to your beloved parent and halt a foot from her to keep from crashing into her.

A grin comes onto your features and becomes bigger when she smiles back and pats your head, your ears twitching from delight.

Realization comes to you when you remember that you have forgotten your toy back at the tree. Asking your mother if you could go reclaim it, and at her nod you run out for it.

The wind blows through the branches and teases the leaves on the tree, the glowing sun already disappearing behind the horizon, its golden rays dimming with every minute and upon reaching the tall tree, you see that your ball is no longer there.

Arms akimbo and a small pout on your face shows your annoyance and confusion and using your nose, you sniff out for your belonging, knowing that your scent would be on there.

The smell reaches your nostrils, your mind shouting in glee that you have managed to find it. When you round a corner, you see a group of people tossing the ball into the air and kicking it to one another. Even though you are displeased that they were playing with it, you couldn't pass up the chance of wanting someone to play with and rush right over.

Stopping directly in front of the one who held the ball in his hand, you reach up and ask if you can have it back, even though you have every intention of playing with them.

The man smiles and tosses the toy over his shoulder and you run after the bouncing object. When it rolls to a small stop, you bend down to pick it up and turn around to see that the crowd was dispersing. As you watch them leave, you hear soft footfalls behind you and turn around to see your beautiful mother walking with all the regal nobility that she was born with, come to you. Running over to her, you wrap your small arms around her waist and tighten your grip as you look up and ask about the remark you heard from a woman who was part of the group.

"What's a half-breed?" you ask innocently.

As her brown orbs meet your eyes, your heart seems to clench at the sight before you now.

A salty drop falls onto your cheek and watch as your mother cries. Blinking as to what had made her upset you open your mouth to ask. You are then slightly surprised and blink once more when she suddenly pulls you closer and embraces you in a tight, yet loving grip.

What made her cry? You ponder to yourself.

Was it what you had asked that made her suddenly shed tears? Not wishing to see your parent cry over something, you begin to soothe her by patting the small of her back and telling her softly that she should not be shedding tears.

She pulls away and wipes the remaining tears from her face, then stands up and entwines her delicate fingers with yours.

The toy you had left comes back with a jolt and you once more ask to retrieve it. With a gentle smile and a nod, you jog back to it, its still round form just barely an inch from the water's edge. As you scoop it up, your reflection catches your attention. Though you have passed by yourself many times in mirrors, something made you stop and stare, the words from earlier echoing in your mind.

Golden orbs as bright and yellow as the sun, with silver strands glistening in the light of the pale moon run down your back. Opening your mouth, as you recalled the child who became frightened by your smile, you see white, milky fangs. Reaching up with to poke at the fang, you see small little claws forming at the end of your nails.

Was this a half-breed? You ask yourself. Is this what a hanyou was?

Yourself?

You fail to notice that your brows had furrowed in dislike and you suddenly lash out at the clean water, the ripples shredding the reflection of your golden oculars and silver mane.

As you approach your mother, and claim her hand in yours, you ask yourself: Will you remain like this forever?

You hope not.


	6. Lovely Hate, Hateful Love

Your love is tainted. Your hate is pure.

Black obsidian tresses frame your winsome face, your cold shell maneuvering through the landscape. Green leaves that shined with the warm rays from above and the songs from the birds are wasted on you.

For you hate everything alive. And yet… You still cherish the living.

You were once the most honored priestess, the one everyone sought for to seek answers and plead for your remedies in the healing of the sick.

Though you still do, you continue to live a solitary existence. You dare not become attached to anything, and anyone like before. For if you did… They might end up hurt just like before.

You still care for that one.

The one who made you feel like an ordinary human, and not just the protector of a sacred object full of malice.

His golden eyes seemed to bore into your skin, heat rushing to your cheeks as your eyes met. When his lips met yours, you felt elevated, as his clawed hand would wrap itself lovingly around your waist.

The day you had felt your shoulder feel ripped apart, body screaming in pain, your anguished face met the very same golden gaze that you had come to adore…

You felt more alone than ever before.

Were you to be denied everything? The one who was more pure than anything? But…

If you were regarded to be pure, then why did you make the love you had become so corrupt?

Seething with hate, you attempt to kill him, but could not. For deep down, something protested against this, which crushed the opportunity to claim his life like you should've done so long ago. But instead, you placed under a sleep and let death's cold hands grip your own to plunge you forever into the fiery depths of the netherworld.

Your soul suddenly cries out in protest as the body you are in succumbs to the dark magic that was summoning you. Upon hearing his voice, the body's heart skips a beat and you spurt forth, entering the clay vessel that sat there with a neutral expression.

As you enter it, you can feel the changes occur. The clay shell was becoming flesh and was rapidly gaining warmth as blood seemed to rush into it. Reaching up, you touch your face, and realize with a sense of dread you had returned to the land of the living.

You could sense his presence. Opening your eyes, emotions take over you and you are overcome with the desire of wrapping your arms round his waist, the wish to make him fall to knees and plead for mercy as you shot an arrow into his chest and listened to his cries ringing in your ears.

The very idea had you laughing and sobbing all at once.

As the fight wore on, and you shot the finishing blow directly towards the heart that could've been yours, a pulse from the body you were in calls out. Fully aware that if she stole your entire soul, his life could not end at your hands, so you flee.

Weak from the exhaustion, you trip and fall down a steep cliff that would take your life, when you suddenly feel a warm hand grip your wrist. Glancing up, his golden eyes meet yours again and his anguished face causes you to wonder why he feels like this?

Does he truly wish for your death? Does he hate you that much? Did your love for him make him more tainted than before that he hates you for it? Are you that dirty?

Electricity bursts from your hand to release him, not bearing to see him any longer. But as you fall down, and hear him cry your name, you enjoy the moment for it reminded you of those times that were now distant memories of another life, another woman.

You now wander the earth as a lost soul without purpose, except to seek vengeance. The once pure woman that you were is now gone and replaced with a hateful monster that knows nothing but sorrow and freedom.

You are free to feel, but you are the dead and the dead do not feel.

The irony of death's favorite toy; through death you are free but you are still not allowed to feel.

But you can feel and death could not take that. You can feel love and hate but the purity of your love for him has become tainted with hate, and the deep hatred has become clean with your love.

Your love is tainted. Your hate is pure.

A/N: Does this make sense…?


	7. Sesshomaru has alot of admirers

"Sesshomaru-sama!" a young girl shouted cheerfully as she bounded across the field.

The cold taiyoukai halted in his steps to glance over at his approaching ward.

"I'm so glad that you've returned milord," the bubbly Rin said gaily as she handed him the flowers she gathered for him.

Taking the flowers delicately from her hand, Sesshomaru nodded thanks and was about to ask her how she fared when she suddenly began to exuberantly jump up and down and wrapped her arms around his thigh.

"You accepted them!" she said as she clapped her hands in joy.

"Yes…?" Sesshomaru said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. Maybe she had a fever?

"Then you accept the proposal I made,"

"What proposal?"

Rin smiled happily before answering. "Since you took the flowers Sesshomaru-sama, then that means when I grow up I get to be your new bride!"

Sesshomaru took a step back and almost groaned when he heard his ward spouting such nonsense. If things couldn't be weirder, a bunch of Sesshomaru fans jumped up from their hiding places.

"**IN YOUR DREAMS BRAT!!!"**

The taiyoukai merely stood as he glanced back and forth between the angry crowd and his young ward. What the hell happened to his perfect day?

"Look, Rin, but you know I can't marry you,"

Rin blinked while the fans breathed sighs of relief.

"Why not Lord Sesshomaru?" Rin asked innocently.

"Well… It'd be… Uh… Aside from you being human, don't you think it'd be awkward to marry someone who's your father figure?"

"Who said I ever looked at you as a father milord?"

"What?" Sesshomaru said in disbelief. He had to blink several times to contemplate to what she was saying. "So… You never looked at me as your surrogate father?"

"Nope," Rin said happily as she shook her head. "Why do you think I followed you around?"

Sesshomaru literally sweat dropped while a big ass question mark and exclamation mark appeared right over his head. _I can't believe that a __**seven year old **__had plans to __**marry**__ me when we first met!! _

The taiyoukai then sighed. It would appear that not even children are unsusceptible to his masculine sexuality and unearthly beauty. Sometimes it was hard being a demon, but the day he'd admit that would be when he fluffs Ah-Un!

"Rin, you misunderstand that my feelings for you… are simply not like that…"

"Oh," was all the little girl could say as she looked down.

Sesshomaru didn't want to hurt her feelings so as he mentally sighed he asked, "Do you want to go shopping for Barbies?"

Rin's head immediately rose and her eyes shined as she nodded her head vigorously.

"Yes! We still have a chance!" a Sesshomaru fan shouted as the others joined in a victorious cry.

"Sorry but no you don't," he told them calmly.

The fans gasped. "Why not?!!" they asked.

"Cause I'm a fictional character and you guys are living in a fantasy. Even Jaken has a better chance at getting with me than you people,"

"Really?!" the kappa demon asked he popped from behind a bush.

"It's merely a figure of speech!" Sesshomaru told his servant. Why'd he have to say Jaken?

All the ones who sought for Sesshomaru's affection sighed and slinked begrudgingly away.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" Rin asked after a moment.

"Hm?"

"Can we go shopping for Barbies now?"


	8. New Management

Kagome grabbed Inuyasha's hand, the sun shining down brilliantly down on them as a gentle wind blew their hair out of their faces.

"Cut!" the director shouted.

Inuyasha let out a sigh of relief. "Finally!" He immediately releases Kagome's hand and walks toward his trailer.

"Where the hell are you going?" she asks angrily.

"Nowhere," he replied quickly. Another sappy love scene. How much more of this was he going to take?

Several of the workers on the set rushed up to him to inform him of the next scene, but quickly brushed past them, his nose high in the air as he opened his door and walked in.

"God, why won't they realize I need a break? They should pick on Kagome more, all she does is stand there like a complete idiot and EVERYONE loves her! WTH?!"

Miroku walked onto the set, and watched as a fuming Kagome was struggling to open the cap of her water bottle.

"A little trouble there?" he asked good naturedly.

The teenager scoffed and set down the bottle. "Damn right! Inuyasha's being a total jerk off and no one's doing a thing about it."

"He is the main character," he pointed out.

"That's no reason to be such an asshole!"

The monk sighed before taking the seat next to her. "Have you forgotten the fact that Inuyasha doesn't like all this dripping sweetness scenes?"

"No, but that doesn't mean he has to be mean to me!" she said as she slammed her hand on the arm rest.

Another sigh escaped him. He told the director that they should think about these love scenes more thoroughly. After all, working with your ex is not the good way to make a series.

"So, you still like him?" he asked, though he knew the answer.

Kagome bit her bottom lip. "Yes, unfortunately… God, why does he have to be so damn irresistible?!"

"Tell me about it," a monotone voice came from behind.

"Hey Kikyo," Miroku said cheerfully while Kagome let out a derisive snort. Another ex of Inuyasha's. Joy.

"So, you wrapped up with episode?" the older miko questioned the monk, completely disregarding the heated glare that was being sent her way.

"Yeah, we're gonna shoot the coming episode next week though,"

"Ah, sounds like you have been busy,"

Miroku grinned as he patted the seat beside his and asked Kikyo to sit down. She politely accepted the proffered chair before daintily settling into it.

"Oh, yes, before I forget, the director said that he'd like to speak with us later privately,"

"Really?" Miroku asked while Kagome's head came up to hear what she had to say.

"Yes, something about… new management…"

Miroku gulped while Kagome let out a terrified gasp.

"We're not going to be replaced are we?" the younger female inquired.

Kikyo shrugged her shoulders. "I haven't got all the details but something is definitely going to happen in a little bit,"

This weighed heavily upon their minds before Sango broke the tight silence.

"Hey guys,"

"Hey," the three said simultaneously.

Sango glanced furtively about, her brown eyes quickly surveying the set before turning to them. "So ya here about the new management business?"

"Yeah, Kikyo just told us," Kagome informed her friend and co worker.

"Well anyways, they say the director is thinking about selling our contracts,"

"What?!" they shouted drawing the attention of several passersby.

Sango vigorously nodded her head. "Yeah, it's true. I heard the director talking to someone just the other day,"

"Do you know who?" Miroku questioned nervously.

The woman shook her head. "No, I couldn't see their face either. Whatever is happening, it can't be good,"

"Yes," Kikyo agreed. "Remember what happened to the cast of Maisson Ikkoku and Ranma?"

The four shuddered at the very mention of the other popular shows and manga created by their Takahashi-san. Since the shows and manga ended things have become very downhill for them.

"Have you spoken to them at all Kikyo?" Kagome asked as she sipped her water.

Kikyo nodded in acknowledgement. "I ran into Ranma the other day at the store. Poor boy, he's informed me that he's now working in some yaoi production,"

"_EWWWW…_" Miroku said as he wrinkled his nose in disgust and a shiver ran down his spine. "So he's working in some yaoi rag down show,"

"Yes, it's rather sad seeing as he had the potential for something… better than that…"

Sango let out a sigh. "At least his job beats working in run of the mill McDonald's. I neeeever want to work there,"

Inuyasha suddenly popped up behind them. "What's all this talk about that shitty place?"

The four looked at each other and began to wonder they should give him the details.

"Why're you looking at me like that?" the hanyou asked impatiently.

Kagome decided to go first. "Well, you see Inuyasha…"

Before she could tell him all he needs to hear, the director shouted through the microphone. "Will the stars of Inuyasha please come and see me in my office,"

"Fuck now what?" Inuyasha grunted as he crossed over to the room on the other side.

The others followed his lead and entered the room where Sesshomaru and Kagura already stood.

"About damn time," Kagura said as she watched them slowly come in.

"Stuff it," Inuyasha retorted quickly, his golden orbs landing on their producer and manager. "Why'd you call us here anyway?"

Giving his stars a nervous smile, the director slowly rose from his overstuffed chair before speaking to them. "Well, I'm sure some of you have already heard that we're going to be under some new management,"

"What?" the hanyou asked angrily. "Why wasn't I told?"

Kagome patted his shoulder. "We were going to tell you but we didn't get the chance,"

"You guys are all fuckers," he said, irked about the fact that they hadn't told him in time. Then he would've dealt with their back stabbing manager sooner.

"Now, I understand you are upset, but promise me you won't go and destroy the studio Inuyasha,"

Giving him a scoff, Inuyasha cocked his head at an arrogant angle. "You shouldn't worry so much about the studio; you should be more worked up about your life,"

A gulp was heard from the man behind the desk as he began to twiddle his thumbs with anxiety for his life. "Um… Anyway, someone has the intention of purchasing your contracts and such so… I told them 'yes',"

"You will die…" the brothers said as they grabbed the hilts of their swords.

The director began to shake his hands in the air and made an attempt to calm them down but it didn't go well.

"Inuyasha, you don't fully intend to kill our boss do you. After all, you'll get sent to jail," Miroku inquired calmly.

"Oh puh-lease! Jail is nothing, are you kidding? I can kill all of those assholes in there with one swing,"

Yes…" the director agreed as he sweated profusely, the swords deadly close to his neck as he touched the tips with his finger. "I'm sure… You'll be able to deal with them… One handedly…"

The hanyou felt the urge to cut him in half, but to do so on an opponent weaker than yourself, and unarmed no less, would haunt to him mercilessly. "Fine I'll let you live," he said. Before the director could say anything he interrupted further. "But first, you have to tell us who we're letting have our contracts,"

"Okay," he said as he walked towards the door. "You can come in now,"

Dark crimson orbs flashed coldly as a figure with long black hair walked inside the room.

"_**Naraku!!!**_" they all shouted from the shock.

The two brothers grabbed their swords again. "_**DIIIIEEE…!**_"

"Save me!!" he shouted as he hid cowardly behind Naraku.

Naraku glared at the cowering human over his shoulder. Turning back to the rest of his cast members, he smirked. "Well, well, I'm so glad to be your new boss."

"I'm not," they all said at the same time.

Naraku let his eyes wander from one to the next as he scrutinized them. "You might as well have me now as your manager then later,"

"Why should we?" Sango asked derisively.

"You realize that this series is only 167 episodes,"

"What?!"

Naraku nodded as he looked down at his well manicured nails. "Of course; this is not going to be very long. We might be one of the most popular anime and manga to ever be created, but our glory won't last long. At least with me you won't end up working in some rag down yaoi production like Ranma,"

"_EWWWW_," Miroku said once more, not even able to take in the fact about doing it in the same bed with the same gender. His heart has been broken to many times to let _that_ happen again.

"Anyways, you should be thanking me. After all, your wimpy little man over here was planning on selling to work at some fast food joint once he collected ten percent of your pays,"

"You fucking bastard!" the males shouted as they began to move forward towards their ex boss.

Naraku put up a hand to silence them. "Now, now, there will be time to kill him later. Right now, we're going to have to discuss about the cast arrangement and what we plan to do after the series is no longer going,"

"Huh?" Kagome asked as she took in the news.

"First, we're going to discuss the business we're going to do once the series comes to an end,"

"What kind of business?" Kagura questioned as she fanned herself.

Naraku gave them a smirk before continuing. "Well, as I've recently discovered, the Inuyasha fandom is going insane with FanFiction and websites so of course, you may know by now that there are many lemons and dedication sites out there with certain characters,"

"Yeah…" Miroku said happily as his eyes took on a dreamy look.

The puppeteer blinked at the monk's now glazed expression but shrugged it off. "Anyways, the cast of Inuyasha is doing quite well, but later the cast will change when we start something new."

"We're going to be separated," Sesshomaru stated more than questioned as he crossed his arms.

"No, of course not milord. But we will take out fandom to the next level when we start our line of porno movies,"

"PORN?!!" the men asked delightfully.

"PORN?!!" the women asked in revulsion.

"Yes," he said calmly to both groups. "Think of the products, endorsements and money we'd make off of this. You can't honestly tell me that you prefer working at McDonald's or something compared to this sweet offer,"

"Why should we be doing this?" Sango asked as the females agreed behind her.

"Well, for one you're beautiful bodies will be displayed all around the globe. You don't want that,"

"No!" Kikyo shouted as Sango and Kagome nodded. Kagura was silently contemplating this though. "Hmmm, this is a very intriguing offer Naraku," she said after a moment.

"I thought you didn't want to do it," Kagome asked peevishly.

"I'm starting to see this thing differently though. It sounds like fun,"

Inuyasha snorted. "Yeah, after all, the wind does blow in all kinds of ways,"

"You'd know that wouldn't you?" Kagura asked as she sent him a saucy wink.

The hanyou blushed before averting his gaze to something else, but Kagome caught it.

"So, Inuyasha, you never told me you were with Kagura,"

Inuyasha stammered before finding his tongue. "It was a couple of parties' sheesh! Besides, don't start getting on my case, after all, you had fun with some wind of your own,"

It was now her turn to become scarlet. "It wasn't my fault!" she said in her own defense as she recalled her encounter with a certain wolf.

"And she insults me about being a whore," Kikyo whispered to Sango who nodded her head.

"I heard that!" Kagome shouted at her. "Besides, you _are_ a whore! You were with Kagura _and_ Koga!"

Kikyo smirked. "At least, when I'm getting knocked up, I'm not in some drunken stupor and can recall it the next day. _Without _a hangover,"

Kagome let a frown fall on her face. Damn her for being right!

Sango giggled as she watched the argument. "Kagura is fun though ne?"

"I know. And with her, after we do it we can just talk while men just want to leave. She's better than any man," Kikyo answered as she and Sango began to talk about the wind demoness.

Sesshomaru glared at the chattering women. "Ha, you can't possibly be serious that she's better than me,"

"Oh no milord, you are far beyond compare," Sango said as she wrapped her arm around his waist.

"Oh I concur," Kikyo murmured as she twined her arm through the crook of his.

Miroku and Inuyasha frowned as they watched the youkai gain the women's attention.

Naraku smiled at his now relaxed group before speaking. "So, you guys agree to the porno?"

"Yes, boss!" they all said.

"Good," he said before he placed back on the evil façade. "You may kill the manager now,"

Kagome spoke up before they could touch the man on the floor.

"Uh, Naraku, who is going to go first?"

The hanyou leered at her before answering her question. "Let's just say that pretty soon, two dogs are now going to roll in bed,"


	9. Don't Forget to Use Protection!

"So what's this?" Inuyasha asked in a suspicious tone.

Kagome giggled. "It's for protection."

"But I don't need protection." The hanyou huffed impatiently. "Just let me do it, Kagome,"

"Nope you have to have protection. You don't want anything to happen do you?"

"No… I guess not." he replied, albeit reluctantly. "But… It's gonna feel weird having it on my…thing."

Kagome smiled. "I'm telling, you nothing's going to happen Inuyasha, you'll get used to having it on."

"But, how the hell am I gonna be able to use it properly?"

"Just relax while I slip it on. Sides, you get to pick a color. Which color do you want?"

"Fine," Inuyasha grunted. "I'll take the black one,"

Kagome put on the protection on his head and let him get on her bike. "There now you are ready,"

"This better work." he said as he began to peddle.


	10. To Wish Upon a Demon

"Come back here you lecherous monk!" the young woman shouted angrily as she ran after him, shaking her fists in the air.

Glancing back over his shoulder, the monk, Miroku, could not help but toss her a teasing grin as he continued to run for his life. He suddenly felt a rush of wind and found the slayer come up from behind and knock him down to the ground with a roundhouse kick to his feet. Feeling a punch swung to his head, Miroku looked back up to a furious Sango and began to chuckle nervously as he started to think about different ideas to help him with his dangerous predicament.

"You lecher!" the taijiya said as she gave him a kick.

"Sango…" Miroku said while he scratched the back of his head. Backing slowly up to the side of a large scale of rock, he thumbed against it rather softly, but something fell from the top and landed hard onto his head.

"Ow!" the monk cried and rubbed the sore spot.

Sango stared curiously down at the object, entranced by it's luminosity due to the sun's rays and it reflected lovely beams of blue and green.

"Beautiful; I've never seen such a wonderful stone," she said in a low voice and held it up better to examine it.

"Where do you suppose it came from?" the houshi inquired as he walked to her side.

Shrugging her shoulders, Sango tilted it to the right then left and suddenly it began to vibrate in her hands. Still holding onto the gem, the slayer watched as it kept glowing till a young woman with blonde hair and blue eyes emerged from the stone and landed right in front of them.

Giving them a radiant smile, the woman spoke. "Thank you for saving me; I'm Fuji."

"As in the mountain?" Sango asked politely though warily from the sudden appearance.

Miroku was already in front of the young woman and asked his infamous question. "May you do me the honor of bearing my children?"

Fuji blinked then looked down as she saw the monk kiss the dirt.

"Ignore him, he's just a pervert." The slayer told the blonde beauty. "I'm Sango by the way,"

"Miroku." The houshi introduced himself as he picked himself up from the ground.

"Pleasure to meet you and know the names of my rescuers. For I have been trapped inside that stone for several hundred years and wasn't allowed to come out till I was removed from that ledge. And as a reward, I will grant each of you three wishes."

Sango and Miroku exchanged glances before nodding in agreement. Fuji smiled at their acceptance for her gift then turned to the monk. "What's your first wish?"

Miroku pondered for a moment then a grin came onto his face and said. "I wish all the people in a nearby village became females."

Fuji granted it while Sango only rolled her eyes at his simplicity. Meeting Fuji's gaze, Sango made her wish. "I wish for my Hiraikotsu." Fuji granted it and the giant boomerang showed up and landed right in front of the slayer. Bending down to retrieve it, the houshi made his second wish. "I wish for all the people in that village to become female."

Nodding, the demoness made the wish come true and turned to the young woman who made hers. "I wish Kirara was here." In the next instant, Kirara appeared in a fiery burst and landed before her mistress. Miroku was confused; why didn't she just wait till returning back to the campsite to get her boomerang and Kirara? Paying no heed to the matter any further, Miroku made his final wish.

"I wish everyone in the world, except me, was a girl."

Fuji sighed mentally before answering the monk's desire. She was beginning to see why this monk was frustrating to the taijiya; he had absolutely no chastity. Sliding her blue eyes over to the quiet dark haired female, she asked. "Miss Sango, yours?"

Giving the demoness a polite smile, she told Kirara to transform and climbed onto her back with the boomerang held tightly in her grip. Suddenly, looking over her shoulder, she gave the monk a wicked grin like he had sent her a while before; he felt a chill run down his spine and Sango made her final wish.

"I wish Miroku was gay."


	11. Never Try New Things

Kikyo wandered through the forest and looked up at the blue sky, not a single cloud evident within the endless cerulean. Sighing, the miko began to wonder what would change for her if she became more like her reincarnation. "How does everything work out for my reincarnation, after all she is essentially me, with lack of perseverance and with that bouncy hair? Hmmm." Deciding that it was time to see if she could do it, she prepared herself for change.

* * *

Sliding up the hem of her hakamas till they reach her mid thigh, Kikyo scratched her head from the itchiness the leaves in her hair gave to create the bounciness of her reincarnation's hair.

A rustle from behind caught her immediate attention, and a few demons appeared from behind and eyed her closely from her strange apparel.

"Hello woman," one of them said.

Kikyo wondered about what Kagome would say were she in this situation. "Let me guess: you have come to make me your bride because my beauty is unmatched, especially against my original."

"No, we're just going to eat you!" the next one shouted as it bit off her hand.

"What the?" all of them said simultaneously as they stared at the ripped hand that spilled no blood. Pursing her lips in annoyance, the priestess tapped the demon on its beak which automatically made it release her hand, and she slapped him soundlessly with it before disintegrating them with a flick of her wrist. Sighing, she continued on.

* * *

Heading towards a nearby village, she noticed that everyone was staring at her and whispering comments but she didn't pay much attention. A monk watched her and nervously waved her over before closing his eyes with his hand and going back into contemplative thought.

"I've already attracted a monk; this has to be one of Kagome's secrets." Kikyo whispered to herself.

Opening his eyes, the monk widened them a bit at her appearance and slowly roamed her figure with them, taking in the short pants and slightly opened haori to reveal a bit more of her neck.

"I couldn't help but notice the way you're dressed and…"

"Yes?"

"Uh, I know I'm not supposed to do this but…" he said as he reached inside his pocket and pulled out a hefty bag of jingling coins. "But, um, I can pay up front!"

"So you were having problems with a merchant?" Kikyo inquired after he finished.

"Yes; and you have helped me solve my dilemma, so would you be so kind as to accompany me?"

Nodding, she rose from her seat and followed him over to a man with a cart.

"This young woman here has aided us in solving our problem good sir."

Looking up and down Kikyo's form, the merchant smiled. "Hell, just give me her and I'll gladly give you all I own!"

* * *

"So this artifact is a sacred one which you men have sought your entire lives?" Kikyo questioned as she observed the priceless object.

"Yes prost—I mean priestess. This is the most powerful object we've ever tracked down and were it to fall in the hands of evil, the results would be calamitous."

The small group gathered around nodded in agreement, then stopped as they stared down at the now broken item which Kikyo had touched with a slim finger.

"Oh dear! It seems that I have shattered the sacred artifact and now I must have you join my group in order to restore it, and now it seems that I have slammed you into the ground with my spiritual power. I don't suppose this is a bad time to ask whether or not one of you will fall in love with me?"

* * *

Fuming from their un-chivalrous actions, the miko continued on when she suddenly heard a shout and saw a flash of silver hair. Here's a perfect test! Throwing aside her bow and arrows, Kikyo let the gigantic demon approach her and she pretended to be helpless.

"Help, Inuyasha! Save me!" she cried in an overly dramatic voice as she flailed her arms in the air.

"Kikyo?" the hanyou asked in disbelief, not so much as to why she was there, but as to the question of why is she without a weapon.

Suddenly the monster's foot stomped her into the ground. "Kikyo!" Inuyasha cried as he began to rush over to her.

"Dammit Inuyasha…!" a muffled curse from beneath the foot came then a brilliant burst of energy spewed out and killed the demon in one blast.

"Kikyo, are you alright?" Inuyasha asked as he kneeled down beside her and brushed aside the bangs filled with dry leaves.

"I'm alright." She replied tonelessly. This so was not her style.

"Kikyo what are you doing here?!" Sango and Shippo shouted angrily at her while Kagome merely stared on with a sad, distant expression.

"Yes," Miroku questioned dazedly while he appreciatively took in the new wardrobe of the resurrected priestess. "Why are you here?"

"Stop it Miroku," the hanyou threatened as he helped Kikyo to her feet. "You're alright aren't you?"

"What about Kagome?" the kitsune shouted as he pointed accusingly at Inuyasha before sliding his green irises over to the young girl whose eyes brimmed with tears.

"Inuyasha, I have come to tell you that if you truly wish to be with my reincarnation, I allow it for all I want is your deep happiness. Give Kagome my best wishes." Kikyo told him, all the while keeping his golden eyes fixed with hers and she gave him the sappy puppy eyed look that Kagome used which seemed to have an effect.

"Uh…" Inuyasha said stupidly as he blinked at her sudden attitude which was so alike to Kagome's

"Kikyo I…"

"Beloved." Said Kikyo while Kagome said her own command in a harsh tone. "Sit!"

* * *

Watching Inuyasha falling into the ground, Kikyo sighed and walked aimlessly till she found the Bone Eater's well then peered over the edge into the darkness. A large bird-like screech resounded in her ears, and a whoosh from overhead sent her over the side and into the well.

She found herself cursing mentally, one of the few times she actually cussed, as she gruelingly climbed out from the deep pit and out into a shabby looking little hut. Sliding open the door, she found herself meeting a young man holding several items in his hand, with a 'clean cut' look as he stared her up and down.

"Wow, Higurashi, what happened to you?"

* * *

"So you're telling me that you're one of my reincar—Kagome's classmates and you come to court her even though she already has a 'boyfriend?'"

"Well, I wouldn't put it that way Miss Kikyo; are you sure you're alright? You have to rest after you fell into the well like that."

"I am alright; so correct me if I'm wrong but you come here bearing gifts and herbal remedies though she constantly rejects you?"

"Yes," Hojo said as he smiled pleasantly. "These flowers specially bred for her hay fever while the bamboo is for her swelling. I understand though that she'll never have feelings for me, and I've accepted it really. I know she has a boyfriend (or three according to Eri and Yuka) but I still want to be her friend. Someone with a tragic and unfortunate life such as hers needs as much love and support as we can give; it's as though everything bad happens to her."

* * *

When Kagome Higurashi returned from the Sengoku Jidai a few hours later, her delighted 'Hi I'm home!' was interrupted by a very angry Kikyo, who began to beat her over the head relentlessly with the special bred flowers that were supposed to help her with her fever. 


	12. Kikyo is Kagome's Grandma!

A/N: I don't know what possessed me to do this…

* * *

Kagome sighed heavily, remembering the argument she and Inuyasha had a while before. Why was he always so insensitive? Didn't he understand that she loved him?

A knock from outside her door cause her to bring up her head, not really wanting to deal with anyone at the moment, she shouted angrily. "Go away!"

A head with short brown hair peeked inside, a gentle smile plastered in the woman's face.

"Kagome dear, are you alright?" her mother questioned softly.

The young girl shook her head, brushing away the tears that threatened to escape.

"I'm alright mom,"

Slumping her shoulders in defeat, her mother stared at her for a while then approached her daughter's bed. Sitting down next to her, she wrapped an arm comfortingly around her, preparing herself to tell Kagome the truth.

"Kagome, did I ever tell you about how your father looked liked?"

Blinking at the change in subject, Kagome turned to face her mother. "No you didn't."

"Well I think in order for you to understand Inuyasha's feelings for you is to know how he plays a part in this."

"What?" Kagome inquired. "What do you mean? He loves me, I know he does!"

"Yes but not the way you want him to!" she told her. "Inuyasha will never love you in a romantic way Kagome."

Becoming silent to her parent's words, her cast down her head, trying to fathom how her mother could tell her something so cruel.

Noticing her daughter's silence, she continued on more gently. "The reason for this Kagome is because Inuyasha is your father."

At hearing this, a big ass question and exclamation point fell right on top of the young teenager's head. Inuyasha, the man she loved, was her father?!?!

"HOW?! IT CAN'T BE!!"

Smiling at Kagome nervously, she began to twiddle her thumbs, trying to explain it more clearly. "You see Kagome, I met Inuyasha when I was twenty, and when I fell down the well, he was not yet bound to the tree and after knowing him for a while, we… you know…" she whispered, a blush rising to her cheeks.

Kagome could NOT believe what she was hearing! "But, how did you get down the well?"

At this, she gave her daughter her best guess. "Probably because the jewel was not yet destroyed so I could pass through."

Her heartbeat quickening, Kagome stood abruptly and ran down the stairs. Her mother calling out to her. "You're not going to tell him I told you are you?!"

Ignoring her, Kagome jumped into the well, and came out to the other side, immediately pulling herself out and running towards the village, searching for a flash of silver or a red blur. Finally spotting him near the Sacred Tree, she ran towards him, catching him completely off guard with a slap to the face.

"You fucked my mom!" she shouted at him, not caring in the least whether she cussed or not.

The hanyou blinked questioningly, still shocked by the slap on his face. "Mika--I mean your mom?"

Kagome pointed accusingly at him. "Ah ha! No one knows my mom's first name; not even me and Souta!"

Inuyasha's face became completely confused. "You don't know your own mother's name?"

Blushing by what he meant, she shook her head and continued on. "Don't change the subject! Why is it that you screwed my mom?"

"She was attractive." he replied unabashedly.

Mouth hanging open, Kagome began to decide which feeling was stronger: the feeling to 'sit' him till he actually reaches hell or just faint and hope she dies on the spot from humiliation. Why humiliation? Her mother fucked her crush first!

Suddenly a shout from behind reached their ears, and Kagome's mother, Mika, came bounding up to them.

"I'm sorry dear," she started apologizing incessantly. "Please don't sit your father."

"Now I'm going to call Inuyasha 'father'?" the teenager cried out.

Inuyasha quickly came to reprimand his biologically daughter. "Don't talk to your mother like that,"

Kagome was just in shock then remembered the woman whom she so resembled. "What about Kikyo Inuyasha?"

Mika blinked and turned to face him. "Who's Kikyo?"

Inuyasha scratched the side of his face. "Kikyo is…"

"Kikyo is Inuyasha's ex." Kagome finished for him, a smirk now slowly appearing on her face.

"Is this true?" Mika asked, more out of curiosity than hurt.

Suddenly, the very miko they were speaking off appeared through the bushes. "Kikyo?!" Inuyasha and Kagome inquired simultaneously.

Kikyo gave them a polite nod, and then turned to Inuyasha. "Inuyasha, I'm going to tell you something: I do not love you the way you think I do."

"What?" the hanyou asked hurt showing in his eyes.

Kikyo quickly rushed to him, soothing him by caressing his ears. "No, I do care for you, just not the way you all believed."

At this, everyone was at loss then another pair of golden eyes and silver hair appeared next to them. It wasn't Sesshomaru though.

"Old man?!" Inuyasha shouted in disbelief, Kagome's mouth open wide while Mika only stood in the background.

"Hi son!" Inutaisho greeted his youngest child, tightly gripping him in a headlock and began to give him a noogie.

Inuyasha stared, dumbfounded then turned back and forth between the two. "Wait…" looking closer to Kikyo's features, he did notice that she looked familiar to his mother; _really_ familiar.

"That's right," the dog demon general said delightfully. "Kikyo is your actual mother; sorry we never told you that when we transformed her to become immortal, some stuff changed."

"I'm attracted to my mother?!" the hanyou shouted at himself in disbelief.

"Kikyo's my grandma?!" the teenager shouted at herself in surprise.

Mika only clasped her hands together and sighed. "I never wanted to meet my in-laws…"

A gopher suddenly popped up and shouted. "INCEST!!!!!" then disappeared.


	13. Lecher

**Lecher**

He absolutely loved women; young healthy beautiful women and he could never stop himself, never could control his greed and lust for them. Heart pounding with adrenaline, a feeling he usually felt only in the rush of battle; his eyes danced mischievously, rubbing his hands in anticipation of the moment while his grin only widened further. A girl here, a young maiden there, women everywhere! Swift and diligent was he, for he was close to one now; hips gently swaying, dark tresses framing lovely features of soft, tender skin. So close…so near… A slap to the face brought him out of his reverie, and while rubbing his sore cheek, he looked up in fear at his towering fiancée.

"Myoga!"


	14. Nightmare

**Nightmare**

The entire classroom was silent, Kagome sitting with a nonchalant expression, watching the clock go _tick!...tick!...tick!_. That was why she was startled when the door opened so abruptly, the quiet that hang heavily broken by the sound of the door being slammed to the wall; sharp gasps escaped the girls, boys standing in shock which caused the legs of their chairs to squeak on the tiled floor, the teacher simply dropping the book from his hand.

She rose immediately, crying out his name in raw concern. When she caught him, she felt his blood stain her clothes, his silver hair unkempt with small shreds of his haori dangling in the air.

Despite his condition…he came back for her.

She smiled through her tears. It was short-lived however.

He stopped breathing…

Eyes wide with fright, Kagome woke up in her bed.

* * *

A/N: Based off the episode where Inuyasha pushed her through the well. 


	15. Vow

**Vow**

She was simply amazing in his eyes...a single white lily in the battlefield.

Young and bursting with healthy beauty, she dazzled him in ways he never thought he could be; brown tresses sailing behind her head, giant boomerang in tow, wearing a tight black outfit that accentuated her slender curves-which were delightful considering she was only at the tender age of twelve summers.

But her age made no difference; for then, in one swift movement, she was able to bring down the demon. The young slayer was breathtaking in her aggressive dance, and as he approached her and took her hands in his-soft and warm-he promised himself that _she _would become his future wife.

No matter how long it took.

Now, years later, Kuranosuke took her hands again and voiced his proposal aloud.


	16. For You

A/N: Written for a Kikyou community on LJ.

* * *

**For You**

It was completely peaceful, almost enough to drown the senses in the feeling of serenity; for the day was warm and sweet, patches of gold flitting across earthen colored hair.

Kohaku, however, paid no attention to the brightness of this fresh morning. He had nothing to look forward to with each birth of a dawn. There was no life, no expectance or repentance of past sins. All he was capable of was fulfilling the duty of a boy he resembled, the young taijiya who had danced with his sister and flew into a clear blue sky upon a giant cat. Enraptured in bliss and content…

But that was no more. Now, he could only pretend-just like she.

The priestess his enemy feared, keeper of the Shikon no Tama and a soul that did not cry-Kikyou.

The boy was never sure why he was captivated by the woman. She was beautiful, indeed, but there were many other reasons, for she possessed countless qualities. There was her kind nature, a natural grace and decorum he had seen in royalty; she was confident in her ability of destroying a nemesis, strong and intelligent.

He loved her deeply, his Kikyou-sama.

Kohaku noticed a bright flash of crimson and knelt down.

When he traveled alongside her, there was a feeling of calm and lightness in his non-beating heart. It was a sensation he used to experience when he and his sister were together, a memory he kept in his blurry mind. He heaved a sigh that released no breath, recalling more scenes of a happier time and wishes he wanted to make…

The sacred shard embedded in his spine tingled and he cut off what he thought.

He wasn't entirely sure why he'd shudder; there only needed to be a small hope, it could hold meaning or insignificance-but the jewel would react faintly. Often time, the young child would contemplate what would occur if he truly dared to make a wish-if he would continue "living" or join his family in the dark.

But there were people who might still be counting upon him; he couldn't abandon his only sister like a millennium before nor forfeit himself and his rotting mind to his enemy.

The boy raised among exterminators refused to do so.

Then, there was Kikyou.

He had no doubts that she could survive alone. Those qualities he appointed earlier would assure him of her welfare, but he was not going to walk away. Kohaku cared for her, cherished her like nothing else. She meant a lot to him, close to equaling his beloved sister.

But there was a difference.

The young lad saw ebony silks from his peripheral vision.

Kikyou wasn't really Sango; there were traits when he almost felt he was with her, but that wasn't the case. Kikyou was frigid and cool, aloofness as her demeanor and sorrow was her "life". Warmth he'd never truly see from the miko was always in his sister when their paths crossed.

That was the aspect the pair would never share the same way.

It didn't mean Kikyou was not able to show such an explicit emotion.

Was it? He thought as he approached the priestess and spoke her name.

"For you," he timidly whispered.

In the corner of his mind, curiosity peaked, the boy wanted happiness-for everyone who felt Naraku's wrath.

Kohaku felt nervous as the priestess inspected the delicate thing in his hand, blood rushing to his cheeks despite the lack of life.

He wondered if the jewel would glimmer.

Silently, his eyes remained on the miko as she wrapped lean fingers around the green stem. To his delight, the woman smiled kindly; and to add more to his happiness, she touched his head and gently ruffled his hair.

Another trait from Sango…

The shard did not shine as they began their trek again. There was no need for a wish now that he received a rare smile from Kikyou.

He can't bring her true bliss because he's not alive; and she can't seek her own no matter how much she longs for it. That's why he bears flowers.

They're the only things that can still breathe in the hands of the dead.


	17. Safe

**AN: Because I haven't written anything for them in a while. And because my favourite author is too patient with me. **

**This is one of the themes which will be focused in one of my oneshots for the pairing as well... Once I get back to them anyway. This is all I can put up for now.**

* * *

**Safe**

_It was good. _

_It was bad. _

_Her heart will be more guarded. _

_Her heart will be more shattered. _

_She can live,_

_as she dies._

_It hurts him to know._

_It makes him happy to know._

_The woman is strong. _

_The woman is weak._

_He loves her; true._

_She loves him; he's certain._

_Which is why he hurt her. _

_Which is why he broke her. _

_Purposely inflicted the lowest of blows. _

_Made sure she saw him holding another._

_She's too loyal, too sweet. _

_She's too loving, too self-sacrificing. _

_He didn't want anything to happen to her. _

_Promised his cursed soul that he'd protect_ _her._

_It pulses and builds--_

_racing and matching the beat of his heart._

_It palpitates further--for she's there,_

_standing like the earthly angel she was. _

_But he knows the others will stop her._

_He told them it was coming, and they agreed. _

_She's crying now, screaming she wants to go with him._

_He smiles; like he said: she's too self-sacrificing. _

_They have her in a firm grip._

_He's saddened, but more elated._

_He's ascending even as he plummets down. _

_But the real celestial being's alive and well._

_Sango's safe…_


	18. Poison

**AN: I totally forgot I did something. I think the theme was... "haiku"... Yeah, that was it!**

**

* * *

**

_Silver tendrils gleam _

_A green light glows in clawed hands_

_Fool; meet his poison_


	19. Careful

**AN: If Sesshomaru were real, he'd probably deny such stuff happened. This was for another theme on LiveJournal I did long ago; the theme was, maybe, "Parents and children". **

* * *

Careful

Despite much rejoicing, there was an even greater amount of doubt in the survival of the first-born son of the Western Domain; for he was born two months before his actual birth date.

Physicians and healers from throughout the lands, and even across the tumultuous seas were summoned before the Inu no Taisho. He and his mate had their minds fraught with worry, despair churning their hearts at the notion of their child not making it through; the doctors had said so-rather quickly as well before leaving so as not to suffer those deathly blows from already stressed inu yokai parents.

The pup would merely have to survive on his own.

Nobody expected the boy to actually strive on, resembling a normal looking babe once his illnesses had passed.

The father, it seemed, was far more relieved than the mother. Not entirely so--the female dog-demon merely didn't show such emotion before the council or her people. And it didn't surprise the clan either that a child of hers would inherit said traits.

The woman let a gentle smile adorn her features in the secrecy of the room, only showing it to her son. She had noticed that he was an intellectual-already showing an interest in the ancient texts of demon scholars long since passed. Her mate was delighted that his son had already attempted to enter the royal armor room, his small but sturdy fingers reaching for sword hanging on the wall.

Though both were happy about the strength and durability their son was already beginning to show, she took extra precautions to ensure the safety of her beloved Sesshomaru; she could not risk having him die after already enduring such an emotional blow to his premature arrival. And she was positive that her mate agreed, albeit a bit more relaxed on the matter.

There were things that reached her ears though-ones that made her proud and others that made her blood turn hot with rage. Among the staff and the people, they had immediately begun to refer to him as a 'special child'. For some, it was due to the amount of will power he possessed for one so very young. To others, he was merely put down because he had been born sickly and weak; even if he did manage to escape death's hands, it didn't cause any sort of admiration to blossom in them.

A maid from the kitchen informed her of it, but she merely kept the ire in check. If that was what they wished to think, then so be it. She tried convincing herself that their thoughts didn't matter. But it was still difficult to hear them whenever she would pass by the servants' quarters-unbeknownst to them.

Letting the cold mask slip back on, she told the servant to enter before they even fully approached the door.

"Pardon me my Lady, but the Inu no Taisho wishes to see his son,"

There was no need for him to heed her permission; but her husband had always seemed to be rather proper.

"Sesshomaru," she said stoically while walking to him, "Your father has requested your presence,"

Not even glancing up at her, the young pup allowed her to scoop him up, hiding his disappointment behind an equally nonchalant gaze from being torn apart from the exquisite painting which he had been sitting in front of.

Following the scent of her mate, she reached his location with no difficulty. Opening the door to the study, she gracefully entered but was almost caught off guard when her mate appeared before her out of thin air. Her mask remained intact; but nonetheless, she inwardly wished that he would be more considerate.

"You're not in an ill-mannered disposition today my Lord," the woman said primly.

The Inu no Taisho gave his mate a quirky smile, raising a heavy eyebrow as he did so. "Do I honestly appear to be an unpredictable individual my love?"

"Especially when you use 'my love', my Lord," she returned with a haughty sniff.

Ignoring the sarcastic bite in her tone, the daiyoukai took his son into his arms, smirking a bit at the emotionless façade he wore. This one equates his mother in stubbornness--but surpassing her completely in the wariness those golden oculars emitted in thin slits.

Amusing little thing… he thought to himself as he continued to scrutinize the babe.

The demon suddenly tossed his pup into the air, noticing the surprise on the boy's face and the gasp from behind.

"My Lord!" the female inu-youkai scolded harshly, briskly gliding over to the man's side. "What precisely are you doing?"

He ignored her for a moment, simply keeping his gaze on Sesshomaru, whose own golden pools had widened to the size of plates from being thrown into the air. He caught the anger glinting in the little one's eyes, however, didn't cease his actions.

"Careful dear," the woman reprimanded again, a bit more gentle as she reverted back to her normally composed self.

The Inu no Taisho gave her a brief sidelong glance. "Sesshomaru won't be harmed in any way. He's strong enough,"

"The mere fact he's a pure-blooded demon doesn't change anything. He could still get hurt." In truth, she understood what he was saying; it still didn't ease the concern.

It wasn't enough to make him stop. If this boy, their child, had the ability to stand against the odds of living and win, then a little change in altitude shouldn't cause Sesshomaru any amount of fear.

Suddenly, they heard it…

Sesshomaru's cold expression melted, eyes closed in sheer delight as bubbling giggles escaped his throat. It was a wonderful sound--one neither truly expected to hear or have the feeling of warmth enter their hearts. The young woman stared on, practically wilting away under him, would've died happily when she heard it.

The name seemed to suit him well…

"Well I'll be…" the Lord of the West murmured to himself, continuing to keep him airborne.

Sesshomaru was now red and blue in the face, no doubt becoming sick with the queasiness of being tossed around like a plaything and the laughing. Though the new mother didn't want the music her son was making to end, she asked her husband to stop.

He conceded with her wish, holding the pup slightly close, observing the glimmer of mirth flicker away for a moment, but come back instantly. The Inu no Taisho had expected the stoicism to return; so he smiled his widest at their young son who held his lean finger in an iron grip.

"This boy is going to be a rambunctious one when he gets older," he told his wife, chuckling a bit.

"He gets those genes from his father," the silver haired woman replied softly, stroking her son tenderly on the head, radiating a smile for him.

Sesshomaru really was a special child; and soon, the whole domain and beyond would witness it and behold their killing perfection.


	20. Not What It Seems

AN: I've always had this kind of idea in mind, but since someone else posted the idea before me, credit goes to the author, **baka deshi** and their story Role Reversal. Theirs is much better than this--believe me. XD

**Not What It Seems**

He was always watching her; always waiting and smiling; always waiting and planning.

On his bike now, he rode it until he made it to the Higurashi shrine. There she was on the top of the steps, lithe form stumbling slightly when a friend jerked her back by the arm, another companion not inconspicuously pointing down.

He waved.

She waved back.

But he could tell it was reluctant.

The boy passed her friends on the steps as they descended, each girl giving him a pretty smile. Inwardly, he smirked; they wanted him, but he only wanted_ her_.

"Higurashi," he said pleasantly.

"Hey, Hojo-kun," she returned, turning on that transparent cheery disposition. She was always lying to him. "What brings you here?"

He let his eyes narrow. "I want to know when you're going to stop."

"Stop what…?" Kagome replied, blinking.

He shook his head briefly, showing his exasperation. "When you're going to stop lying."

"Lying?" she breathed. "I haven't lied to you. Lying about what?"

"About everything," the boy murmured, hanging his head.

She placed her hand on his shoulder, bending a little to look up at him. "Hojo-kun…?"

He raised his head then, and kissed her. She was in shock, but her eyes fluttered closed.

"Hojo-kun?" she asked, feeling his arms wrap around her shoulders, bringing her closer.

"I can't wait anymore… I don't_ want_ to wait anymore…" he whispered against her hair, inhaling deeply.

Kagome felt her heart beat; the way his voice dropped to a husky baritone was familiar, the pain in his voice. It reminded her… She responded, wrapping her slender arms around his waist. Her fingers rested on the middle of his back; it was incredibly hot in that spot.

If she'd seen his face however, she would've gasped at the terribly intense way his eyes smoldered and darkened, the smirk that spoke of predatory desire.

And she would've known that this wasn't him—but the enemy with a burn in the shape of a spider.


End file.
